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If someone were to ask you five years ago what Roseanne was up to these days, you’d be lost for words.  Recently, though, she emerged from whatever rock she was hiding underneath and is everywhere.  A Comedy Central roast, a new reality show, and oddly enough, a run for President.  But instead of focusing on any of those things, let’s discuss her hair style from 20 years ago.

You may not have known it, but Roseanne is Jewish. Sure, she’s one of those few and far between white trash Jews, but a Jew nonetheless. Don’t believe me?

Just look at her hair from 1988:

And 1990:

And 1992, when she was somehow Jewish AND Asian:


Let me start by saying I don’t know much about Josh Groban. As I am neither a 14-year-old girl nor 40-year-old woman, I know nearly nothing about his body of work, his personal life, or anything else.  But there is something I do know.  With a face and hair like that, the guy is totally Jewish:

Interestingly enough, the one song that I know by Josh Groban is his version of O Holy Night.  Now, it may be weird for a Jewish boy to have profited off a Christmas song the way he did, but like many Jewish singers and songwriters before him, Groban simply knows how to make a buck. And while his grandmother might be thinking “holy night, shmoly night,” Groban and his Jew-fro are currently plotting to record another Christmas song so he can extort even more money from the goyim.

Time for another fun-filled edition of Guess the Jew-Fro!

This person has one of the most famous Jew-fros in the world.  Whether you love this guy or hate him, everyone in the world at least knows who he is.  And his legendary Jew-fro is part of the reason he is so well known…well, there’s that and his distinctive voice.  Okay, enough chit-chat, this one should be pretty easy…

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I can’t believe it’s taken me this long to write about Seth Rogen on a blog about Jewish people’s hair.  The guy practically made Jew-fros popular again.  (Not that they ever went out of style for some of us, mind you.)

I'm sure he'd much rather be Seth Frogen than Seth Rogaine.

Aside from reintroducing the Jew-fro to a new generation, in many ways, Seth Rogen is the most typical, and stereotypical, Jew around.  Think about it.  In addition to the curly hair, he’s chubby, has glasses, and generally looks pretty goofy – typical physical traits for many of us Jewish males.  Moreover, by all accounts, he’s a very nice guy in real life.  And what does he do for a living?  He writes, acts, and does standup comedy.  Three typically Jewish professions in one.

For these reasons, I hereby proclaim Seth Rogen the patron saint of!

He has a halo, but it's hidden under all that hair.

Wait a minute…us Jews don’t believe in saints.  So let’s call him our patron mensch.  Yeah, that’s more like it.

Time for another round of Guess the Jew-Fro!

The woman (or man – some people think this person’s gender is up for debate) pictured below sported an impressive dark pile of hair in her younger years.  While this person had different hair styles throughout the decades up until her golden years, her hair always retained some kind of kink or curl.  It just goes to show no matter how famous someone gets, you can never fully take the Jew-fro out of the girl (or boy).

(HINT:  I already gave you a couple.  This should be easy.)

Still not sure? Read the rest of this entry »

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